If you have a speech stutter please know your speech stutter is God-given and you are created to stutter, so stutter on friend! If you are a friend of someone who stutters and you are wanting to know how to talk about the stuttering with your friend, here are some ideas to get you started. 🙂
- Tell you friend to let their stutter out and that you like when you hear them stutter because it means they are being emotionally honest with their own organic thoughts vs. changing their thoughts to appear more fluent.
- Look into their pupils while their stuttering, encourage them to look into your eyes while their stuttering as well.
- NEVER NEVER NEVER finish their words for them, people do this ALL THE TIME thinking it is helpful, it is not. The person NEEDS to stutter and let them stutter and let them take their time to get the words out.
- Ask your friend about his or her stutter like you would about any other aspect of their life. Most stutterers like to talk about their stutter sometimes and they feel closer to people when other people show care for wanting to learn about their stutter. This is not a one time conversation, this is a recurring conversation through out the whole friendship. If you stutter, your stutter is a part of your story and personality. Your stutter is B-E-A-U-T-I-F-U-L! If someone does not care to get to know that part of your story, you do not want to be friends with them. The BEST of friends will care about getting to know all of the parts of your story. One way to get the conversation going is by saying; bring me into your world with your stutter? or is there anything you want to talk about regarding your stuttering journey? or What questions do you want me to ask you about your stutter? Stuttering is a journey towards self acceptance and it is a beautiful journey and it is designed to be shared with others.
- As a friend of a person who stutters you may want to ask your friend if you could put in some voluntary stutters while you are with them, so they feel more comfortable to stutter in front of you. A good friendship is summed up by complete understanding, truth, acceptance, and comfort. What better way to provide these things to your friends than by asking them about their stutter and you stuttering when you are with them? I cant think of one:) Tell your friend that you looooove to hear them stutter. Why? Because stuttering is a conscience choice and it grows courage, when someone allows themselves to stutter, they are choosing authenticity and courage.
All for now, have a fabulous day and BE BLESSED.
Kelly Johnson, ma, lpc