Hello! I’ve been quite busy here the last couple weeks, so blogging has been put on the back burner:) I will get to part II of Family of Origin Wounds in this blog, but before I do that I must share a story. Last week I was looking at my website page regarding eating disorders and there was a statement on my page that said something a long the lines of, “there are temptations all around Denver to side tract you from your weight loss goals so you must be prepared!” When I read that I was SHOCKED! WHAT?! I never wrote that! I would NEVER say that in a million years. Food is AMAZING, food is GREAT, God gave us food for our enjoyment, not to restrict it. How did that sentence get put in there? Then it dawned on me, I hired an SEO company several years back and they went on my website and made changes to my content to optimize my SEO. Word from the Wise: All Therapists, never allow SEO companies to change your content. (or make sure you pre-approve all changes before they put it on your website.)
Anyways, more about Family of Origin Wounds, the last few blogs were just cut and pasted from a book that I was working on, but for this second part I’m going to shoot it straight from the heart because I can’t find the computer chord for my computer and I don’t have my book content to copy and paste from. (probably a good thing actually.)
So how do we heal from our family of origin wounds? For starters, be honest about your wounds and be honest about how you have wounded others as well. What did you need from you parents emotionally that you did not receive? In what ways did your parents hurt your feelings growing up? Pay attention to these answers, write a list of the painful memories that you carry, what are the questions that you wanted your parents to ask you that they never did? Shy away from glossing over these questions. Additionally, if you are a parent, be honest with yourself about how you have wounded your children. When we are comfortable in our own skin, we can look at this stuff head on and we don’t feel a need to justify or minimize it. For example, as a parent you may say; I have blessed my children by;____________________________________________. I have hurt my children or enabled my children by; __________________________________. The more you can be open about this stuff, the more it will help YOU to heal from your own family of origin wounds.
There are many excellent books on this topic, for a list of some of the books I would recommend please click on the link here. Also, if you read the book “Toxic Parents” and think to yourself, “Wow, I am a toxic parent!” I want you to know that wounded people, wound other people. So if you are a Toxic Parent, please give yourself some love because more than likely your parent(s) were a toxic parent as well. BTW, just because your a toxic parent does NOT mean that you don’t LOVE your child very much, it just means that you can be toxic in how you parent and you need to learn some skills and tools to help you to become a better parent. 🙂 An INCREDIBLE parent is a parent that recognizes their toxic as a parent and get’s help.
As I am wrapping up here, its time to share with you another “Gluten Free 5 ingredient or Less Recipe” So here is a recipe for a copy cat cilantro rice recipe. (Because cilantro rice at Chipotle is simply A-M-A-Z-I-N-G!
Kelly Johnson, MA, LPC